Some people are toxic. There is a reason why people criticize others. These people may be deeply unhappy, have a low self-esteem, and perhaps even depressed. The world often seems bleak and like everyone is their enemy.
When people insult you, this is a reflection of how they feel inside. So, when people shoot with a potshot, I just see it for what it's worth. That they are insecure or jealous. I feel sorry for these people, and if I can't help them, I try to distance myself from them.
So if you don't like the "ideas" I share in this blog, and you feel you have a better idea, well, then, get a moving and put it to action. Provide your own suggestions.
Either way, people who insult others have baggage in their life. These people are unhappy, depressed or insecure and it is best to ignore them rather than fuel their misery by fighting back.
I tend to discriminate between "disagreement" and "disagreeableness."
ReplyDeleteThe former is when you look at someone's opinion, decide it doesn't logically fit together, doesn't match your own experience, or doesn't take into account other observations. In this case, the best approach is to offer up another opinion that "fills in the gaps," so to speak. The difference of opinion doesn't necessarily mean a difference of people, and those who can be at odds in one domain, might be allies in another, with no emotional difficulty.
The latter, however, is a personality trait, one that shows up across multiple, disparate situations. These are people who are going out of their way to be antagonistic. They don't rely on arguing another perspective, but instead, on pejorative value judgments and character assassination. More, since it *is* a personality trait, such unpleasant people will be unpleasant in all circumstances, not just a particular domain.
It sounds like you've had an unpleasant brush with disagreeableness, our Marla....